You know, or not. On Monday I ran over 6 miles, and I felt great. Ready to go and run a few more miles on Tuesday. And then on Tuesday, I was rejected from a job I had applied for some weeks earlier. I had interviewed for this job, and I thought I had a pretty good chance of at least getting a second interview, if not the job itself. Sadly, the organization thought otherwise, and they decided to go another direction (or something).
I'd like to think I take disappointments well, but truthfully, I don't. Not at first anyway. This particular rejection was a huge blow to my confidence, and it hurt to receive the news. Anyway, the long and short of this is that right after I got their e-mail, I went and, in a blind fury, kicked my car. Full on with my left big toe. Needless to say, I wrecked my toe. Haha, there really is such a thing as karma. I deserve the pain and inability to put any weight on my left toe. Probably shouldn't have reacted so physically to my job rejection. But life is hard sometimes, and sometimes you just need to kick an immovable steel object. Unfortunately, said kick, while briefly satisfying, has left me with a bruised big toe and no chance of running for a few days.
The toe seems to be getting better, although it is still comically swollen and multicolored. It's still just one more stupid thing heaped on top of this year of not-so-much-awesome. I know most of my gripes are petty and comparatively lame. Even if I don't like it, at least I have a job; food to eat; running shoes. The world is chaotic; our country is slouching towards a Congressional throw-down; people in my own town are a lot worse off than myself. I know all this, and still I bitch and moan about a bruised toe, a job rejection, a life that isn't what I want it to be. But forgive me this. For being only 24, I've paid some of my dues already. I'm allowed to get upset at some things because I know life is difficult; I've put up with a whole hell of a lot of its difficulties already. I have a job; I have my (relative) health. And yet when it rains, it pours. Haha, and then, hopefully, the sun comes out.
Probably, I'm just battling some serious February cabin-fever. I'm going to try and get in some sort of running tomorrow, otherwise, I don't know, my head might explode. My gut is expanding too, another fun side effect of the winter doldrums. Phew. Alright, now that I've had my verbal-vomit session, I'm going to try and do some work. Happy almost-Friday... Think Less. Run More!